Ugly doesn't mean it does not has it goods

Today was an awesome shopping day,
i mean, who don't like to shop right?
buying stuff & goods that you heart for & probably dying to get it,
no offense, some guys wasn't thinking that way,
indeed, they only shop once a year, that kind of pathetic situation,
some even worst case is,
their mom or sister actually shop for them & have no sense of fashion, totally.
that's pretty scary isn't it?
anyway, as always said,
as long as they felt happy & comfortable with the way they got treated,
well, who cares.
for him,
hmm, i think in him, he is a shoppaholic,
but, due to his so called busy schedule,
killed all his time for lots of things,
and even vanished his urge to shop,
he can't even got some time for himself to shop for stuffs that he really needed,
kinda.. kesian huh.
so today, supposed i was just accompany him to shop,
and also continue my X'mas scrap book collection,
ends up, i didn't really take much pictures,
it was like, just cin chai post a bit with the background setting,
then run. Lol,
indeed,it become like i buy more than him,
seem like every shop is vacuum me to enter,
especially, cotton on,
they were like having a huge sale in Pavilion,
everything 50% discount,
then, again,
i got it all home with a handful of big big small small shopping bags.

Woooh.. waaah..
the day is getting nearer,
i'm totally excited about our 1st Christmas,
and, i'm really wanna try to include Popcorn along,
its really hard ditching her n the house alone,
barking while as i leave the house,
then, till tired & sleep,
that's horrible,
so, i don't care,
tomorrow i wanna smuggle her,i will try,
hopefully can find a restaurant that available & allow Popcorn to dine with us.

In these few days,
it seems like everything goes pretty well,
at least, i still got a yet to be happening Christmas day with my family,
however, it wasn't as complete as it seem,
i still felt lack of some shininess & joy that you always brought to us,
i know & i knew my bro & mommy feeling the same thing too,
mom was acting really well in covering her thoughts,
but, just now, i found her just blankly staring at their wedding portrait,
which ever since that day,
all daddy pictures already hide up in a box.
my bro,
*i'm sorry if you are reading this,
but, Jea Jea just being concerning & love you really much.
as back few weeks,
i accidentally found out my bro blog link,
which he keep it very private & not letting me to view,
probably, he wanna maintain his privacy not showing too much to his family,
i don't know, but,he got his reason.
yet, one thing that really surprise me was,
our writing content are so so so..similar,
besides,mostly were about his life with the bunch of friends,
and actually he also turn his sadness into poem too,
which that's what i always do.
there was 1 post that i will never forget,
he wrote about the feeling of growing up without a dad,
as, that time he was just 13 years old,
just at the time he really needed a dad to guide him into man hood,
every words & lines,
its still bleeding & hurt like hell,
i swear, i never once forgot the moment we were in that hospital underground,
what happened there, no 1 know & saw it,
but, that was what both of us gone through it together,
you was hugging me & i was holding your hand really tight,
it reached our maximum pain & sadness,
that's the killing feeling we still carry on,
every time i passes by any medical center,
that image will always strike into my head.
all i want you to know,
Jea Jea & mommy are sharing the pain with you,
you are never alone & never be alone,
and, i'm really glad after reading your blog,
i felt really much relieved & i have faith in you,
just keep on searching for your aim in life,
no rush upon that,
when you are lost,
i am always here for you,
i love you, Shaun,
forever my little brother.

I always believe,
daddy still around us,
looking upon us,
guiding us,
but,just in a different place,
as he is always the bright star above us,
try think it this way bro,

There is a star that guides me,
Wherever I go,
it will follow me & light's so bright
that afraid i might lost,
it always glow & never fail me.

Even when i'm in darkness,
i have no fear,
for my heart knows,
the bright light's near me,
it always glow & leading me.

Although, sometimes i drifted away,
and lose my way & senses,
the bright star finds me
by its shining ray,
it always glow & shine me the way.

It fills my soul with peace and joy,
no one can shatter it,
no one can ever try to destroy it,
there is no one can replace it.

Through rain and shine,
It always stays with me,
forever in my heart,
It will always be glow & shine through my path.
That only 1,
our forever awesome daddy.

If you think going to lead it ordinary, think again.

Yesterday was a boom,
this year annual ball was way out of my expectation,
though, at first i was kinda reluctant to go,
as it might clash with my work & its pretty pricey dol,
while i missed the early bird price,
since the girls are going,
so,might as well just throw it out & have fun.=)
ends up,it was really surprising,
on that night,
there were so many of them that are so talented,
rocker,drama,dancer & even opera singer also available in Bpsy department,
i personally heart that 18 years old beat boxer,
his name is Shaun Lee,
world ranking number 9 in 2009,
i think he can make at least 5 sound at the same time,
and, its Leonard band, An Honest Mistake,
they just released their 1st single on Traxx & Hits FM,
see, HELP Bpsy is full of fun people around,
they were just simply, awesome.
if you think the student were cool,
you don't even wanna imagine how great is the lecturer..
they simply rock the whole department,
try imagine,
the person that teach you in class with a super serious face & clothing,
while on that night,
they transform into a rocker band?
singing, rock & roll and even pop.
isn't it hard to believe,
but that's what happen in HELP Psychology Department,
a land of awesomeness,
prove you, psychology is not death!

As it was a Masquerade ball,
here, my DIY mask for the night. plain?
but,at least its only 1.

Nadia, Siu Mei & Me

As in Chinese lunar calender,
today is the 'Tong Yun' festive,
i don't really recall the real name,
all i know,its a time to celebrate winter & some spiritual thingy,
so,according to those very typical & traditional Chinese,
it is even more important than CNY.
for me, i don't really understand the real thingy,
but,at least my mom will still make the Tong Yun every year,
more likely to a dessert than spiritual celebration,
and me,i just heart Tong Yun like really much,
the texture just wonderful,
bouncy & chewy..
Yumm.. as my bro don't really hype about it,
and i sapu the whole pot.. Lol, i know i'm fat!

and then,
today work was another crazy hype,
as today suddenly got a few teacher was on leave,
therefore, make me 1 person teach 2 class,
at the same time, i gotta teach & look after 6 kids,
which usually 3 kids its enough to kill you,
they need full attention & patient,
to be honest,
i almost make a little girl cry,
as she don't really pay attention on her worksheet,
like,
she really know how to write '8',
but,she will just keep pretend don't understand at all,
and wish you could hold her hand & write it together,
just being really manja & climb over your head,
so, as today i got so many of them,
i'm sort of lost my patient too & voice out a little louder than usual,
then... she like.. sob sob there,
anyway, till the end,
luckily she didn't cry out,
as i try to pujuk her a little bit more.
really scary experience,
try imagine she really cry out loud,
where the mom is just outside the class,
and all i know is,
my job going to drain,
danger.

Long weekend,long stories,sad or happy,you're still moving

I think i'm over doze with energy & hyper-ness,
its all due to my job,
i have to admit the place i work is such dull piece of land,
i think its just this particular branch that i work had such problem,
the branch director leading skill got something wrong,
always over stress on something that so unwanted & being kinda rude to the teachers.
however, after all i would still call this place as a wonderland,
absolutely not that lady,
its the kids,
though,some times teaching might be really tiring & frustrated,
bu,they really cheer me up along the class,
erm,sound wrong isn't it?
aren't suppose the teacher to cheer & lead them learning something new?
anyway,that's not that important,
i would say we are all playing in the right role,
and take everything in equally balance,
that makes them so happy to attend for Maths,
just imagine there are just pre schooler,
kinda kesian them though.

Just like yesterday, which suppose to be an off day,
i forced to work where got no extra paid too,
i went to work with a super emo mood,
i not really giving a friendly smile to that lady,
but,when those kids coming 1 by 1 to my class,
this blame & emo just went away,
this just really surprise me,
by seeing their innocent faces & cute action,
how on earth you got the heart to push them away & ruin whole happy atmosphere.
i still remember there is this little boy,
he is just 5 years old & doing primary 3 Maths work sheets,
he is an extremely talented kids,
and due to yesterday his dad was late to pick him,
so,he was sitting beside me & keep chatting with me,
seriously, he is really 'potential' boy in the future,
he just talk everything,
and shocked me was,
he ask me for Facebook & MSN account.

Boy : teacher do you play game?
Me : nope, teacher don't really play, what game do you play?
Boy : woooo, i have lots of game, i play FB game; pets society.
Me : WAH~~~ means you have an account for FB? in my heart( wtf, what kind of world is this, 5 years old FB-ing)
Boy : teacher, what is account? it is e-mail?
Me : Yes.
Boy : XXX_XXX@yahoo.com, teacher add me on MSN too, so we can chat.
Me : totally speechless & OMG..

Then, thank god before i could react, his dad was here. phew..
come on,he is just 5 years old,
seriously, i don't know why, but i'm really scare of kids like this,
not they are extra ordinary smart,
just felt so....indescribable, just a weird feeling in myself.

*******

Today i was in OU,again, this time i'm with siu mei,
we thought of going for a movie,
cause its really been a long time we hang out,
but,then, the queue is crazy,
the amount of people in OU is insane,
it took me quite a while to get a parking space.
every where you go,its fully packed with humans.
but,after all, not so bad,
cause i found my mask for the prom,
silly us, don't know for what reason rushing to get it,
then, walk around and found a few shop selling cheaper & the design is even better,
till now i still felt kinda regret, RM15.90 for a plain black mask. ouch~!
so,if ... if i rajin enough,
i will DIY myself,
adding some details with those glitters glue on my mask,
on that night i will have the very special,only 1 Pearly master piece mask.. LOL.

Then,today i found a Pony outlet in OU,
which only selling kids cloths,
and its really really cheap,
for a very pretty flower chiffon dress only cost you RM12..
therefore, i give a try & bought my princess Popcorn a dress,
its really cute,
unfortunately, i overestimate her & bought the size was too big for her,
she can't even walk after i put the dress on her,
so wasted, huh?
though, it is cheap but still..
i think if my cousin don't mind,
i can give it to her baby girl.


i got some quote that inspired by siu mei,
which was from her aunt, i guess, anyway..
Girls are like an apple,
those drop off from the tree & lay on the floor,
are always got the 1st impression attention & easily got taken by people,
cause they afraid laying too long & might spoil,
for those that lay up above the tree trunk,
are those that hardly been seen,
indeed,they are the best quality among the whole tree,
cause they invest on the patient of the collector.
ladies,
you wanna be the lower grade type of apple,
or the upper class?
and i conclude it,
beauty has its expiry date,
but,inner beauty are ever lasting.
for guys that don't bother to listen to you,
don't wanna be patient & spend a little more time on you,
does that still worth for your investment?
or you should invest some taste?

cheer me up & spice up my life

Jingle bell,Jingle bell,Jingle all the way~~
Let it snow,Let is snow,Let it snow~~
Ho Ho Ho~~ Merry Christmas..
along this jolly month,
everywhere you go will be surrounded with this happiness aura.
so strong that you can't sit still & wait for it yo come,
Christmas day is just a week from now,
i don't why,
i'm so excited & looking forward upon the day to come,
usually i did, but not so much like i'm over joy about it,
knowing myself,
i hate hoping too much & giving something too high hope,
i admit that,cause i afraid if things doesn't go along my way,
i might get hurt & emo for the rest of the night,
yet,this year i think some one or something just hit on the right spot in my head,
where this feeling seem like already disappear from my brain.
so,for good or bad,
lets enjoy & have fun playing along with it,
i believe we are created to be flexible,
no harm try to put yourself into another side of yourself,right?

Today was in OU with the girls,
unfortunately couldn't gather everyone together,
at least i manage to catch up with Abigail & Peony,
which are the 2 that always the hardest to catch,
the last time i met them was before my departure to Russia,
along with the others for a mini farewell dinner & late movie,
and it was like 4months ago,
so,you can see that both of these girls are really occupied with their life,
until meeting an old friend gotta like so long,
it almost gotta make a appointment to meet Abby. Lol.
however, after all it was a great catch up with them,
as the same,as usual,
and i think its good.=)
but then..
the journey from OU to home is seriously torturing,
it pouring cats & dogs out there,
traffic was crazily congested,
i took up 1hour & 15mins to reached home.
seriously,i found no clue that,
why every time raining will have such havoc traffic?
while,in oversea.. out there is snowing,
thick thick snow,lantai yang amat licin,
people still can drive as usual,traffic still move as usual,
here, Malaysia, its just rain..
come on people, whats wrong with you?

Harrr.. holidays is always good,
though,you got no plan,got no place to hype about,
yet,just by doing nothing, it seem to be the greatest thing that you ever wanted.
so sadly, my holiday wasn't as beautiful according to my plan,
tomorrow suppose to be a public holiday,
but, why on earth i choose to work in a learning center?
i is regretting now, at least at this moment,
tomorrow while people will go for shopping or heading to their long weekend vacation,
and i will pathetically stuck in the center with a bunch of kids,
which i think they are also coming by force too.
see, what a sad place to go for learning,
kids, its time to learn from the hard way & learning its not so much fun dol..
what a bad teacher i am.

Shake it till you drop like OMG

I can hear the temptation of my long lost laziness,
I can smell the sweet sense of holiday are luring after me,
and i woo hoo..
i'm officially free from all sort of exam & assignments,
from now onwards i can start my shake leg program till next year,
goyang,goyang & goyang all my time,
though, this semester break wouldn't have any hype things going on,
maybe, maybe..except going to have an awesome Christmas eve celebration with J & Popcorn,
then,family BBQ gathering on Christmas day,
basically,this year would just have a full of family loves & warm Christmas,
no crazy party,
no overdose or any drunken story,
but,upon all those rushing assignments & chasing after those syllabus that i had missed,
all i want to do is just do nothing & be simple,
that 's enough to make me happy.

Back to my part time job,
yesterday was my 1st day of handling my own class,
honestly, it wasn't as wonderful as i though of,
kids no longer giving that innocent & cute imagine anymore,
i would say, its pretty much scary.
along the group that i carry on,
there are 2 autism kids,
me,saya, that acting smart,
i thought making them feels like a normal kid,
so,i put them to sit together & play together,
but,then,i think i had just shocked them,
1 of the boy,just stood up & started to scream at me,
*cause he cant communicate with us.
then,i gotta chase him back to sit still & continue his class work,
then,because of this,it shocked the rest as well,
all & all,yesterday experience wasn't that pleasant nor a good start.
hopefully,by learning their 'pattern',
i would able to improve myself & give them the best learning experience with me.
playing with kids is fun,
teaching kids is Horrible,
lesson learned.